A Savior No More
by kakakakissy
Summary: Bella's life turns upside down when she can't save Edward from his worst fate. Her life falls apart. How does she take it? READ! review please.
1. Chapter 1

CAUTION: NEW MOON SPOILERS AHEAD.

Roses are red, violets are blue, this story isn't mine….but I'm not going to try to rhyme because I'm very bad at it.

One more thing, this starts at the part in new moon where Alice and Bella are on the plane going to help Edward.

Sorry if it doesn't make sense and if my grammar sucks…because it does.

Chapter 1: Almost

Alice and I sate quiet throughout most of the trip. I noticed, to my shock, that Alice's eyes widened right as the plane landed. I couldn't decide if it was the landing that shocked her or if it was another vision.

"Alice…are you alright?" I asked, a little panicked.

"When we get to the clock tower, I'm going to leave you for a moment…Edward has to tell you something." Uh oh.

I didn't quite understand…but I figured Alice would explain it to me as soon as this was all over and done with. All I had to do was let Edward see that I was alive, and then he would stop.

"I'll need something to hide my skin," Alice said. I looked out the window…sunny.

"Here," I said, taking a navy blue hoody off of someone's seat before they noticed. I handed it to her.

"Let's go."

Huge crowds surrounded the streets, making it very hard for me to get through. Alice was simply pushing people away. I found it difficult to be outside in the sun. I haven't seen a sunny day in such a long time. It felt like I was becoming completely red with sunburn. When I got home, I probably would be. _Home._

Home felt so far away right now. I didn't need to go home…the only home I wanted was to be with Edward again.

"I'm either delusional or I'm already dead." His voice tempted me, but I didn't turn around. "Maybe both."

"Edward." It had been so hard to say his name before, but now it came easily. I could feel the tears of reunion beginning to fall.

His arms wrapped around me, and he pulled me into the shadows.

"Bella," Edward said, his eyes forcing my tears to come faster.

He pulled himself into me and just held me there. I whispered his name a few times; he whispered mine in response. After a while, I desperately needed something more. I tilted my head into his and kissed him without any form of permission. I didn't care.

"No," he whispered, "I won't be able to say goodbye if I ever kiss you again." He said it into my lips. The tears I was crying started to sting my cheeks. I leaned my face into his again, and this time he didn't resist. He kissed me with the passion I needed, what I longed for.

I had to stop kissing him I was crying so hard. I know that if he did say goodbye that I would die…I won't ever be the same. He sobbed into the top of my head. 'No,' I thought, 'this cannot be happening.' I should have never come to Forks.

"I love you so much," Edward said, through his sobs.

"What are you saying goodbye for?" I said; my face was beginning to feel stiff from the saltiness of the moisture pouring from my eyes.

"It's too late…the Volturi are going to kill me."

"NO!" I screamed. "No…Why?"

He ignored my question. "I love you," Edward said, his voice trembling.

"I wish you would have never left me!" I cried. "Don't go, don't leave."

"Just know that I will find you if I stay alive. I'll find you and we'll hide somewhere deep in the forest; a place where no one can find us."

I felt the urgency to blink but I couldn't. I didn't want to miss that fraction of a second that I could think about later. His face could simply vanish from my mind.

"I'll never leave you once I find—"

And then our bodies molded into one, completely mutual. I couldn't tell which fingers were mine and which were his. Our lips were so fierce—so greedy. As we kissed, Edward put a piece of crumpled paper into my hand. What is that?

"I love you," I said.

"I love you," he responded. "Now run. Find Alice and run!"

I nodded and ran for it. I couldn't turn back, I knew he would be looking and then I wouldn't be able to make it out of there.

"Alice!" I called. I couldn't see her hoody anywhere. "Alice?" I said again.

"Go to the airport, get home!" Alice yelled at me from across the street. "They can't see me with you, go!"

My face felt numb when I heard her. I had to go home alone. I saw people filing into a train station to the airport. I pushed my way through people, not bothering to say excuse me as I passed them.

"Perchè siete in una fretta, bella?" one Italian man shouted to me. I heard my name in it…Bella. He either knew my name, or he was calling me beautiful. Either way—it creeped me out. I ran faster, letting my feet stomp loudly on the cement.

Once I finally got a plane ticket, I sat, waiting in the boarding area. I touched the pocket of my jeans…the crumpled note. I had to wait until I was away from this continent so I couldn't go looking for him. I missed him too much. My heart was ripped fiercely into tiny pieces that scattered. I was empty…hollow.

The plane smelled overly clean; the fake smile of the stewardess was annoying me. I just wanted to punch that stupid smile off her face…what did she have to be so happy about?

"Beverage, miss?" I stared back at her Barbie face coldly. "Cookie?" she said, putting a warm, tasty looking cookie in front of me…chocolate chips. (A/N: SORRY! I just really want a cookie right now!)

"Thank you," I said and shoved the cookie in my mouth with only one bite. It wasn't her fault Edward was gone.

It was my fault. If I hadn't jumped off of that stupid cliff none of this would have ever happened. I'm so irresponsible!!

I felt like crying, but my eyes were dry. I just stared out the window until I finally drifted asleep.

"Benvenuto alle signore ed ai signori de New York. Atterreremo presto," the intercom said as I jerked myself out of a sleeping state. I heard New York in there…we're here.

I got off the plane and headed for the next plane…to Seattle. I fell asleep on that one also and I looked everywhere for a payphone once I was off. I dialed Carlisle's cell phone number. He could pick me up and then I could tell him everything.

"Hello?" he answered.

"Carlisle," I began, "will you come and pick me up at the airport please…gate 24A."

"What happened? Is Edward there…is Alice there?" He was worried.

"No…"

"I'll be there soon," Carlisle concluded and hung up. I hung up too and sat down on a bench right under the sign that said gate 24A. I touched my pocket again…the paper urgeing me to open it.

'Open me,' it called. I need you Edward…

I pulled out the yellowish paper and felt the deep creases. It was slightly crumpled. I let my fingers feel the softness of it…it was cold and smooth…like Edward. I began to cry again as I saw what the note said.


	2. Chapter 2

Not mine…let's get on with the chapter shall we?

Chapter 2: The Truth

_My dearest Bella,_

_I can never forgive myself for leaving you. Please know that I left you for your own good. I'm so sorry. I'll find you someday; I know I can survive this. Send Carlisle to come and find me. Alice's visions will lead you to where I am._

_I love you and I will always love you…not matter what._

_Love,_

_Edward_

I flipped the rectangular note over…

_Be Safe…_

It was the note that he gave me the day that he got my truck for me…Edward. I flashed back to that day…be safe…He had wanted me to be safe and it made me excited. My soul was being ripped down the middle. Please be safe, Edward….please.

"Bella!" I heard Carlisle call my name. "What happened?"

------------

Carlisle's car was still the same. Every detail of it. Over the next two hours I explained everything that happened in Europe…but I didn't show him my note. It was for me only anyway…

"He said to talk to you…he told me to tell you that he needed your help." I thought about what the note said about Alice. "Alice might be on her way home right now," I said. She could be safe…dear, sweet Alice. Stay safe.

"Listen," Carlisle began, "I know Charlie is probably very VERY worried right now…so I'll do all the talking, you just look very ill and very tired."

I heard Carlisle's door open and then I heard mine opening.

"May I?" He said, pulling me out of the car and throwing me into his arms. "Look tired," he said.

Easy peasy. Just look tired…

Edward…Alice.

NO! just focus on looking tired.

"BELLA!" I heard Charlie boom. "Dr. Cullen?"

"Good evening, Charlie. You're daughter is very tired." Carlisle's voice was calm. "I'll put her in her bed and I'll tell you everything you need to know."

Carlisle carried me up to my room and set me on my bed. He said goodnight and headed out.

"Wait," I said. "What are you going to tell Charlie?"

Carlisle sighed. "The truth."

Oh no…Charlie is going to flip.

I rested my head on my pillow and listened as hard as I could.

"Charlie…I have something very important to tell you."

I tried to listen more, but I started floating away.

I was in a large, flowery meadow. And Edward was in the center.

"Be safe," he said. A huge hole in my chest ripped further…if that was even possible.

"Edward," I called out. Then, I began to scream out his name. "EDWARD!"

"Bella," Charlie's voice awakened me. "It's okay…" Charlie smelled like whisky. Drinking then. "Carlisle told me"—hiccup—"everything."

Charlie and I talked then…more than we've ever talked before. Actually, it was probably more than Charlie had ever talked in his whole life. I further explained a few things to him about Edward. It hurt worse every time I said his name. After a little bit, I began to talk very fast, describing so many things about Edward. Charlie's snores made me realize that I had gone on too long.

"Goodnight Dad," I said. I was completely awake.

I hopped out of my bed, quietly and went downstairs into the living room. I picked up the remote control and flipped the TV on. The sound was literally blaring. It was louder than any sound I had ever heard in my life. Charlie is definitely going to wake up. I turned it off very fast.

I listened for Charlie's snores…they just got louder.

I sat in silence for a little while. Thinking.

Edward.

He had to be alive somewhere.

And Alic—

Someone knocked on the door. I rushed to the peephole and looked out.

I opened the door, sweat rolling down the back of my neck.

"ALICE!" I screamed and threw myself into her arms. "Where is Edward? Is he safe? Is he okay? Where is he?" I began to look around Alice to find Edward.

I would see him again…such a relief. I love you, Edward.

"Bella…" Alice said. She looked odd. I couldn't quite place her expression, but then I realized a figure behind her…Alice's face held fear—a great deal of fear.

My lips dried and my tongue went numb. Slowly the figure came into view. I began to sweat again and my hands got white and clammy. I'm sure my face was paler than paper.

Suddenly, something terrible dawned on me…Alice's face wasn't fearful. She licked her lips and stared at me.

She was thirsty.

A/N: HAHA! You have to wait. I want some more reviews right now!!! Yes, I am greedy. And yes, Charlie needs to know what's going on because I like to make things easier for Bella and I don't really like Charlie…so I guess you want to know who the figure is…well I'll tell you it will shock you! HAVE FUN! And REVIEW!!!


	3. Chapter 3

Not mine…I'm really getting tired of saying this. Don't read this if you don't feel like crying…or possibly dying. OMG THAT RHYMES!!!

Listen to "Peer Pressure" by Jon Brion when you read this if you have some kind of downloading system. It's perfect for this chapter.

Chapter 3: Tragedy

"Alice?" I said. I was scared beyond belief. She could see it in my eyes.

"I'm thirsty," she said.

"Um…" I didn't know how to respond. Go get a deer? Mention Edward maybe?

I looked around behind her…no one was there. But I swear I saw someone.

"What happened to…?"

"He's gone."

"Who?" I asked…all of a sudden I realized that she knew where Edward was.

Edward…

"Where is-" I began.

Alice interrupted. "I have to talk to you." She pulled me outside of the door and I felt of wave of horror when she closed the door. Alice did say she was thirsty—very thirsty. I prayed that she wouldn't eat me. After all, I was about to see Edward and I didn't want to die before I saw his beautifully perfect face.

Alice looked as if she was going to cry. I was about to touch her shoulder to comfort her, when she began to speak. "Edward is…"

Why would she be crying about Edward…oh no. The hole was burning.

"Dead."

I fell to the ground and Alice didn't stop me. I could hear her quiet sobs. How did she know that?

"I searched everywhere for him before the Volturi got to him…I'm so sorry Bella."

My eyes ached and my head throbbed. Edward… My stomach felt like it was dissolving inside one of my lungs. I couldn't breathe.

"I finally went to the Volturi and begged them for Edward…they told me—" I covered my ears-I'd heard enough. Alice uncovered them for me, gave me a quick hug and ran off into the forest…probably to hunt. I lied on the hard cement for hours, crying; calling out his name, hoping he could hear me…but he never came back.

"Merry Christmas," Rosalie said, handing me a pink wrapped present.

"The same to you," I responded handing her a poorly wrapped purple box with a navy blue bow on it.

Rosalie, Emmett, Jasper, and I decided to go to college together. We were currently going to Matanuska-Susitna University of Alaska (me, as a freshmen and Rosalie, Emmett and Jasper as sophomores). It was cold and cloudy all the time. In fact, I haven't ever seen a sunny day since…Edward's death.

The tiny campus of Mata-Su was perfect for us. Carlisle and Esme moved up with us. We asked Charlie if he wanted to come with us, but he loved it in Seattle. He was repositioned there a few weeks after I moved up here. He's still Chief Swan, but now Chief Swan of Seattle.

I'm always worried about Charlie because he gets a lot more action in Seattle. He isn't worried about me at all. But hey, I've got five super strong, fast running vampires protecting me.

Alice suddenly disappeared from the Cullen's coven. She bought some island all for herself. Occasionally, she comes to visit us, but when she does…it's like she isn't even alive. I feel dead all the time, but I force myself to look happy. The only one who could tell when I was really depressed was Jasper.

Alice and Jasper (although married) were separated now. Alice couldn't make him happy…and Jasper couldn't make her happy, so they decided to end it. Everyone was very shocked…especially me.

Jasper and I were rather close now. He was the youngest of the family and I was the most emotional, so he took care of me on the days that I was so down I couldn't get out of bed.

So here I was, on Christmas day at the Cullen's house…rather Carlisle and Esme's house, opening presents.

Rosalie gave me an expensive pair of earrings and a matching necklace and shoes.

Emmett gave me a purple jolly rancher pillow…purple jolly ranchers are my favorite. (A/N: Hey wadda ya know? Me too!)

Jasper gave me feather boa and a pair of silver, sparkled sunglasses. He told me it was for dressing up for the upcoming play—The Rocky Horror Picture Show. (A/N: I'm really not sure if its picture show or just show…)

I laughed when I opened it and he seemed pleased. He always liked it when I was cheery or happy.

Alice had sent me an outfit as usual. She sent Rosalie and Esme one too. Of course all of our outfits were perfect on us.

We modeled them for Emmett, Jasper, and Carlisle. All of them seemed dazzled. We sat in our new outfits and listened to Christmas tunes on a CD that I have no idea where it came from. After a while, Carlisle and Esme left the room to do other things.

Emmett and Rosalie went away to go give their gifts to each other in secret back at the dorms…bleh.

Jasper and I sat in the living room of the Cullen's house, listening to the CD playing.

I heard a beautiful song being played on the piano. I listened carefully to the tune…it sounded familiar.

But this wasn't a Christmas song…

I felt tears coming.

"Don't cry," Jasper said.

"My lullaby," I whispered. My bottom lip quivered and tiny tears began to fall. Jasper wiped them away with his thumb.

"He loved you," Jasper said. It made me want to cry more, but instead I smiled. Edward did love me, and the only thing he would want right now is for me to be safe…and happy.

_Edward_, I spoke to him in my thoughts. _I need you_.

Jasper put his right hand on the side of my left arm and I felt better.

"Thanks," I said, but he didn't move his hand away from my arm. I felt a little odd…like something wasn't quite right. "Um…Jasper?" I began.

"Hm…?" he responded, but didn't take his hand away yet. I gestured down to my arm and he moved it.

"Do you think he could still be alive?" I said.

"Well…the Volturi…"

"They could be lying." This was the only hope I have left in my body; it was the only thing I wanted.

Jasper sighed. He thought Edward was dead…they all did. Jasper knew better than the rest of us (besides Alice), because he had seen Alice's pain. I never worked up the courage to ask her why the Volturi killed him anyway…he was just…gone.

Jasper sensed the curiosity. "Why so curious?" he said.

"Why did they…" I couldn't say the rest.

He was silent and staring at the wall. "Alice did try to tell you…that day that we found out, but you had covered your ears. And you shouldn't know. Edward wouldn't want you to know."

If Edward didn't want me to know then that was enough. I got up from the couch and sighed. "I think we should go for a drive or something, I can't just sit here. I need a distraction."

Jasper smiled and stood up too. We both headed out towards his car.

"Where to?"

"Dorms," I said.

"Rosalie and Emmett?"

Forgot about that. "I think I'm going to get my car and just take a drive by myself."

Jasper pulled over to the side of the road. "I'll run back, you can use my car. Got your phone?"

"Yup," I said and thanked him for letting me use his car. He's the only one who understands that I need time alone to think.

He hopped out of the car and said drive safe and I moved into the drivers seat. I flipped off the radio, waved goodbye to him and watched him run off.

I sighed and began to drive to nowhere in particular.

I wasn't the person who usually went out to think. Thinking caused me pain most of the time…but I was different somehow. I was a new person. A new Bella…but I didn't feel new. I felt old and torn, withered. I was most unhappy.

I could feel my depression pulling at my heart—the hollow spot that I've felt for what seems like an eternity.

Thinking of him was my only happiness. He was perfect. He was happy.

Jasper.

I looked at my face in the rear-view mirror. Jasper? Did I seriously just think of Jasper? But I meant Edward…am I in love with Jasper? No…He's just a friend.

The rain pelted harder on the windshield and it was becoming hard to see.

I should turn back, I thought.

I pulled over to the side of the road and attempted to do a U-turn. It was easy…maybe I should get a nice car like this…I'm sure the Cullen's would pay for it. But I shouldn't use their money…no I would keep my truck.

Jasper.

I still can't believe I thought his name. I wasn't in love with him…but was he in love with me?

His hand on my arm…he didn't want to move it. His eyes when I told him I wanted to go for a drive. He didn't want to leave me.

He was just being protective, that's all.

Edward was once protective…because he was in love with me.

Suddenly, I couldn't remember what I was doing. I was being foolish and I was driving on the wrong side of the road. When I realized it, I began to move into the lane over…

But it was too late.

A/N: FIVE WHOLE PAGES BABY!!! This is my favorite chapter. I know it's sad but don't worry I'll make it all better. :Band-Aid: Does anyone need a band-aid? Well I am a nurse so don't fret! (yeah I WISH I was a nurse.) Leave reviews and I'll have the next chapters up soon.


	4. Chapter 4

Moo. I'm a pig.

That's the disclaimer up there a little bit to the left yuppers that.

Chapter 4: Transformation

I woke up screaming. Something (or someone) hit me…or I hit them. I couldn't feel my body. I could smell the fresh blood oozing from every inch of my limbs.

The pain took a little while to get to me. Then, I screamed louder.

"Stay strong, please! Stay awake, stay alive." Whose voice is that? Edward…?

"BELLA!" It was Rosalie. I tried to say her name, but I couldn't. My life was slipping away faster by the second. I looked up at her. "Alice was right," she said. "She said it would be me who would change you."

Then, Rosalie's teeth were sinking into my flesh. Here it comes. Not now Rosalie, NOT YET! I began to panic as my neck felt the fire. I screamed.

"Shhh…it's going to be alright," Rosalie tried to calm me, but it wasn't working. The pain, all I could think about was the pain.

The burning made its way to my heart, my throat. I couldn't breathe. Oh my god, I can't breathe! Rosalie help me!

My heartbeat sped up so fast. I was dying. But then my heart stopped all together. I looked into Rosalie's eyes. They were completely black with a little bit of maroon around the edges…She wasn't breathing. I don't know how she did it; she bit me…she changed me.

"How—" I began to speak, but I couldn't stop panting. "How did…"-gasp-"you…find me!" Edward…Edward. I heard his voice. I looked around frantically. "EDWARD IS ALIVE!" I screamed.

Rosalie stroked my hair, but she didn't speak. She didn't want to inhale.

"Rosalie? What's going…Oh my god." Carlisle. "Get out of here Rose!"

Why was he screaming at her, she just saved (or ended I guess) my life! Then I saw out of the corner of my eye, Rosalie was leaning down towards my neck again. Carlisle pushed her away and she ran for it.

I screamed…more pain.

"Bella, I'm taking you back to our house. It will be just fine." Carlisle lifted me effortlessly from Jasper's car. I've killed myself AND wrecked Jaspers car in the process. I looked around for another car…nothing. I let my eyes wander back to the pile of metal. Hit and run? Well, at least I didn't kill anyone else.

"It hurts," I said. Carlisle didn't say anything; he was just running.

While he ran I screamed occasionally, but Carlisle used his hand to cover my mouth. It was cold and it felt good on my burning lips. I didn't feel the need to inhale, but I felt the desire. After Carlisle's hand left my mouth, I breathed in through my nose. It smelled of only blood.

"Alice is here," he said.

Alice. Thoughts rushed…Alice's face. Edward getting angry that I wanted him to change me. He was dead…and now I'm being changed. This isn't the way things were supposed to be. Did Alice know it was going to be this way? I felt more pain, but my thoughts covered it. I was mad at Alice. She's known from the start that it was going to be this way.

Soon, I felt the coolness of the inside of the Cullen's house.

"Bella!" Esme. "Is it going okay? Oh, Bella I'm so sorry that it turned out this way."

"I need to bite her in different places. She's feeling more pain because Rosalie only bit her in one spot." Carlisle looked to his right. I knew Rosalie was standing there. "Draw a cold bath."

I liked the sound of the word cold.

I felt a freezing fingertip on my forehead. "Hi, Bella."

"Alice," was all I could say without breathing. She still had the same pained expression on her face—numb.

Carlisle passed me into Alice's arms and led me towards the bathroom. She took off my t-shirt and jeans. Everything was soaked…bloody.

She set me down into the cold water. I felt instant relief. The cold felt so good on my skin, I couldn't even explain it. I could almost feel it steaming.

"This is going to hurt," Carlisle said, lifting my body out of the bath a little bit. I felt it burn again and I screamed. He sank his teeth into my stomach, then my in each of my legs and finally on both of my hands. My back arched I was in so much agony.

The cold bath didn't feel as good anymore.

---------3 Days Later----------

"Bella? Can you hear me?"

"Jasper?" I said. The pain was gone.

"Oh, Bella!! I'm so sorry! I can't believe I left you alone to drive. I should have stayed with you. This is all my fault!"

"Don't you even start to blame yourself. It was NOT your fault." I thought of the best thing to say. "This was what I wanted…remember?" Yes, want_ed_. I didn't want it when I hit that tree, but it happened anyway.

I looked down at myself. I was sitting in a freezing tub with no clothes on, and Jasper was staring at me.

"Could you hand me a tow—" I looked and it was in my hand; big, pink, fuzzy towel. It would cover me easily. Wow.

"Where did it go?" Jasper said, looking around on the floor.

"I've got it," I said.

"Whoa…"

"Yeah."

I pulled myself out of the tub and cleared my throat as I did. I didn't want Jasper to see me completely naked. (A/N: I always smile when I say the word naked…hehe)

I wrapped the warm towel around me but it didn't warm me up…I guess I'll have to get used to this.

I wonder…what else can I do? Or is that all? Summon things.

Jasper walked out of the room to give me some privacy.

"Thanks," I mumbled.

"Welcome," he whispered. I heard him…and he's gone. Now that's just cool. I smiled a little at my foolishness, but then I was filled with questions.

I had to change first.

"Alice!" I called.

"Yes?" she said, suddenly behind me. "Oh! Yes I went shopping for you. Just a moment."

She flew away from sight and then she was back instantly with a small pile of clothes. For the first time in a just a little over a year, she smiled at me.

"I'm so glad your part of the family now," she said, still cheery. I was happy too…but at the same time I was angry and frustrated. Why now? Why now when it was far too late to save Edward? When he was already dead? I was glad that I couldn't cry right now…because I would be.

"Are you crying?" Alice asked. My face was shocked…crying…that's not even possible. I touched just under my eyes. Moisture…I was crying. As a vampire I was crying.

"I guess so," I said. Alice embraced me into a big hug. "Your scent is still so strong, and still the same. That's strange." She really did seem surprised.

"Maybe because I'm new?"

"No…" Her face was odd.

"Are you okay?"

She was having a vision. I wonder…

I tried to pry into her mind. I tightly closed my eyes.

_I want to see her vision._

Alice was doing my hair. Alice pulled on my hair and I shut my eyes as if concentrating. Jasper suddenly is running down the stairs. He runs to me and kisses me. Alice _smiles_ at us.

"Whoa," I said, shaking the vision away from the back of my eyelids.

"Just a vision," she said, quickly…she sounded depressed. I wondered if I should tell her that I saw what she saw. Alice threw my clothes to the floor. I put my hand over the top of them

_Come_, I thought. And they were in my hand.

_I want Alice to be happy._

I thought it so hard. The words repeated in my head over and over again.

"Come on, Bella!" Rosalie.

"Yeah! We're going to take you hunting and then we're going shopping!" Alice…happy. She was just sad a minute ago.

Well, I know my power now.

"But I'm not thirsty!" I said to them, putting on my clothes.

"How is that even possible?" They both said in unison.

A/N: OKAY! LEAVE ME REVIEWS! Like three people have actually read it!! What is wrong with you? Does my story suck?? You can tell me if it does, but personally I think I have great writing. Okay, so Bella's power is that she can get what ever she wants basically. And I'm going to make it so that she doesn't have to feed. To make things easy for her…I like it that way!


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: Moo.

AN: Sorry if I have a few typos. I have a really bad cold and a sneeze every five seconds!!!

Chapter 5: Jasper

"Hurry!" Rosalie said, laughing. I laughed behind her. We were both racing Jasper, and he was right behind me.

I had never felt so happy as I was now.

Nearly 57 years after Edward's death, we stopped pretending to go to school and just enjoyed being here with each other. Racing was mine and Rosalie's favorite thing to do to pass the time.

(A/N: I HAVE TO SNEEZE!!! AHH!)

Jasper embraced me as he caught up to me. "I'll carry you," he whispered in my ear, "and we'll still beat her."

I smiled as he said the word 'beat.' Just as he did his lips brushed my ear. He kissed underneath my ear and inhaled my scent. Unlike most vampires, my scent was still incredibly tempting. 'Like a perfume that never gets old' Jasper had said once. We'd been together ever since the spring after my first year of being a vampire—only a few days after Alice said she wasn't going to see us ever again.

I…well…I willed myself to be happy. And happiness came. In fact, I've never felt better.

The only thing that that bothered me was Alice. She wasn't my friend any longer. She hates me to the point of destruction. Alice always blames me for Edward, and she also blames me for her unhappiness since I took away Jasper. A few years ago, she threw a hummer at me.

She's the only one who knows ALL of my powers. I can will anything into being. For example, if I wanted my hair to be longer, it would grow. If I wanted myself to be happy, I was. My second power was my humanness…I still had my scent, I don't drink blood…but I don't eat either. Crying is the worst of my powers. I feel others pain and sadness and I begin to cry. That's why I have to be far away from Alice. She makes me cry.

Until recently, I didn't know I had a fourth power. I am incredibly tempting to any creature. Boys fall down to my knees and beg me to be with them.

At night, when everyone else was hunting, I would sit and think that if I wasn't tempting, and if I hadn't willed my happiness, what I would be like now. Did Jasper really love me? Or was it just some stupid fake spell?

Eventually, I convinced myself that he really was in love with me. I loved him…but I wasn't sure if I was _in love _with him, but not even Alice knew that one.

"No fair!" Rosalie shouted, when Jasper touched the side of our house.

Jasper and I laughed hysterically but stopped suddenly, when his lips covered mine.

"Ewe…See you guys later!" Rosalie laughed-shouted.

With his lips still touching my skin, Jasper rushed into our house. He laid me down on the couch and took off his shirt. I smiled at him as he lied down next to me. I fiercely tumbled on top of him and let him pull my shirt over my arms, revealing my dark red lace bra.

I kissed him. Our lips became one, and I smiled. "Bella," he whispered, only it wasn't his raspy deep voice. It was a different voice—musical.

"Edward," I said automatically. Oh no.

"What?" Jasper said, just as my jean skirt fell to the floor. "Did you just call me Edward!?" He was furious.

I picked up a blanket from the side of the couch and threw it over myself and cried. I cried hard. Jasper's anger was making me cry.

"I'm sorry," I said, through sobs. "Please stop."

"No!" he shouted. My chest was ripping apart. I didn't know why he was so angry…did this happen before and I willed myself to forget it? He babbled on about how much I didn't love him.

"No. I love you." I said. The pain from others pain was at least four times worse than becoming a vampire. I opened my mouth wide and screamed louder than I've ever screamed before. "STOP! Just be calm!"

_I want Edward to come back! I need you now more than ever!_

"I loved you! And you pretend I'm Edward! I left Alice for you," Jasper said, as if my screaming was nothing.

"STOP IT SHE SAID!" At first I was confused. That wasn't my voice…or Jaspers.

"Rosalie, you have no say in this!" Jasper shouted.

The pain of anger ripped me to pieces. I mumbled the word stop over and over again. I held my knees to my chest and rocked back and forth on the couch with only the blanket around me.

I couldn't help but scream, "STOP IT ALL! I WANT EDWARD TO COME BACK!"

The blanket threw itself off of me and I was raised into the air by another cold hand. Something hit me across the face…It hit me hard. Pain shattered me. Not the pain of the hit, but of the anger of the hitter.

"Alice!" Rosalie said. Everyone in the room was furious, and my heart was jumping from side to side in my chest. It hurt so badly.

I could hear everyone yelling and fighting each other. And, oh god, I started this.

I attempted to move from the floor, but the sobs were forcing my body to randomly vibrate me back to the couch.

(A/N: Ha-ha, I thought of that because my phone is vibrating right now. Ok: back to seriousness…serious face)

"Please," I whispered. I had to use my power to get me out of here. "Carlisle…Esme, Emmett…Help." My voice was barely audible. I felt as if I was lying her dying on the floor while everyone was arguing. I could hear muffled rocks hitting one another—vampire bodies crashing against each other.

"….Edward's been dead for 57 years! She's in love with you!" Rosalie yelled at Jasper.

"Don't listen to her! Bella has NEVER loved you and you know its true. I love you, and you love me! It doesn't matter how long Edward's been dead." Alice had so much hate in that last sentence that it felt as if I were smashed between a million cars.

Jasper spread a calmness around the room, and I knew he could feel my pain. The anger was probably driving him crazy too. I took a deep breath as the crying stopped along with the slowing pain. Everyone was silent. Alice's comment still hurt, deep down. I felt the urge to cry again, but I didn't. The pit in my stomach was too tough for my tears to get through it.

I wiped my face and heard Alice begin to speak. "Did you know Bella's other power?" She glared at me…no. "She can have anything she wants…and she's tempting. Rosalie you told me once that it seemed Emmett was in love with Bella." That was a surprise. He must not have really been in love with me…it was just a dumb trick.

"I remember…" Jasper said. I pushed my way into his thoughts. _That towel trick…she only did that once. Oh my god, Bella forced me into this relationship. Bella…I thought I was in love with you. _

Suddenly, every trace of anger in him was gone. Now it was extreme sadness. Alice smiled an evil smile at me.

"Jasper, I'm here," she began. "And you love me." Oh! _I_ was forcing Jasper into a relationship! That _bitch_!

I couldn't control myself. Before anyone saw, I crawled my way into the kitchen while they sat together. I pulled out a knife—I'm going to kill Alice…she ruined my entire life.

"You killed Edward!" I screamed, the knife at her throat. She only looked at me like I was too scared to do it. "You ruined my life!" I began to cry and my heart began to jump again. This time it was Rosalie's fault.

"So did you!" I screamed at Rosalie. "You turned me into a vampire. I just wanted to die." I dropped the knife and ran out of there.

First, I couldn't save Edward.

Next, I kept secrets from everyone.

Third, I ruined everyone else's lives.

And, finally, I couldn't bring Edward back. I just want to be done with life. I want to die.

"One ticket to Rome please," I said to the women in the airport, behind the light blue, red, and white American Airlines desk.

"When are we traveling," she said with a smile on her face. I hate fakers.

"As soon as possible."

"We have a flight at 8:30 if you'd like to travel on that one. First class?"

"Please," I said.

I took the ticket from her and rushed to my gate. I only had half an hour to get through all the things, and I didn't have my passport with me. It would take hours to get a new one…and you need a birth certificate…shit.

I would have to run home and get it.

The house was still the same when I got there. I jumped to the second floor and grabbed a black bag that I had ready for immediate departure in case the Cullen's were found out. When we left, we left as a family…but we weren't a family anymore.

I looked through the bag. The only thing that I needed was my passport. I pulled it out and ran out the window. I was almost positive that Jasper and everyone else had heard or smelled me from downstairs, but I didn't care.

"Goodbye," I mumbled as I began to run back to the airport.

"Goodbye," I heard all of them say quietly. I had to force myself away from them…I had a plane to catch.

A/N: okay sorry that was a little fast moving. And I'm sorry if it sucks because I'm STILL not getting any reviews. Anyway, the plot is kind of getting out of hand! Haha, but I don't care. So my fanfiction is totally sad, but it will get better!


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I won't say it again…

Alright this is chapter 6 I believe. If you remember correctly the last chapter--Bella got her passport and all that jazz. Now she's off the plane and HERE WE GO!

Chapter 6: Surprises

I hopped off of the plane and thought about the last time I was here in Europe. I came to save Edward, but I let him die—I let my family die. Alice's heart was ripped here…she disappeared here.

Maybe, once I'm dead, Jasper and Alice will be together again.

Once I'm dead. They can never be happy if I'm still here—here to torment them forever. Even if they think I'm dead it would do some good. Alice would sure be out of her mind with happiness…but Rosalie…she would feel guilty for not going after me.

I took a deep breath and headed towards something that looked very suspicious…vampire house maybe? I sniffed something rather unusual.

I turned around and saw someone (or should I say something) in a black cloak. Well it was sunny outside (black cloaks would be essential for a vampire)…which caused a little problem. But I was going to die anyway so it didn't matter. As a last time using my power I willed the weather to be rainy. Instantly, thunder boomed. I smiled to myself.

I followed in silence—out the airport, across the street, pass the rental car and into the forest. I hid myself from the mysterious person as I trailed. Suddenly, mystifying man took off the cloak and turned behind him…definitely a boy. His face was rather familiar, but, to my dislike, I couldn't quite see his whole face.

Then, he was running and I ran after him—at a safe distance of course.

We ran together for nearly two hours, when he stopped at a sewer. Homeless vampire?

"Come along, Bella," he said. I remained silent…maybe he wasn't talking to me. But then he turned me, and pointed down towards the now open septic tank. Ewe…

I followed him down into the smelly depths of all life.

"H-how do you know my name?"

"Little gift I have…I see what's coming—like your friend Alice." My face dropped when he said the word friend. We used to be friends…we used to be best friends.

"She's not my friend," I mumbled. I desperately searched for a new topic for discussion. "What's your name?"

"Daniel."

Why is it that everyone has such a formal name…no nicknames? It seemed I was the only one.

"Welcome," he said, opening a door that I didn't see there a minute ago. He moved his had towards the door, motioning me to go in. I walked by him and he slammed the door shut, leaving me alone in a strange room with ugly red carpet. It looked like it was from the 1800's. Well…it might have been.

"Bella! How lovely to see you," I turned to a new vampire who was holding out his hand for me to shake. "I am Aro."

"Aro," I repeated…familiar. Edward did tell me his name once, when I was a human but I barely remember anything from those many years ago. The only thing I can recall is a little bit of Charlie and the smell of Edward. I remember everything about him, but not every thing he said. He should have never left.

I took Aro's hand and shook it. His face looked confused and frustrated, much like Edward's face the first day I saw him…when he couldn't read my mind. I pulled away my hand quickly.

"Most interesting," he said. "I know why you've come to see me." He raised one eyebrow and motioned for me to come with him. We walked down a long corridor with the hideous red carpet on the floor. A few paintings and pictures were on the walls, right next to tall dark brown mahogany doors.

"You do?" I said, shocked, but not really caring. I was beginning to feel numb. Why can't they just get it over with? I mean, if they know I want to die why don't they just do it!

Aro ignored my question and began another topic. "Thirsty?" he said.

"I don't drink human blood…" he looked confused. "One of my powers."

"I see…is there anything else you can do?"

I didn't feel like explaining, but I wanted to tell someone the truth. "I can control almost everything." That could have even been an understatement.

"How do you mean?"

"If I want something…I get it. Basically, I can get whatever I want or need. Once, I controlled my own emotion, but it didn't work out right."

"I still don't quite understand. Could you show me?" His face was wickedly positioned. I wasn't sure how to demonstrate. I looked around the hallway.

An old picture stood on the wall. I shifted my eyes to it and it flew into my hand. I closed my eyes and just listened to what it had to say.

"This picture was taken in Ireland on April 5th, 1958. It's a picture of your brother—" Aro closed his eyes and looked hurt…good. "—just before…"

"I understand now," he said. "Well, as a vampire who can control and read and get everything she wants, why do you wish to die?"

I didn't even have to think to answer. "Because every time I use my power, something goes wrong. It's dangerous to play with fate." That was the first time I actually told the truth about why everything goes wrong. I said it so fast, I wasn't thinking. I actually never thought of it that way…_it's dangerous to play with fate_.

"That is true," he said. "You also aren't effected by others powers?"

My face showed confusion. "What?" I was always affected by Jasper and Alice…but not Edward. "Oh…did you—"

"Yes, I tried when you came in." He smiled, and it was so nice it was creepy. I found I was rather dazzled by it. In fifty-seven years, I never knew that Edward wasn't the only one who couldn't use his power against me.

"Come in," he said, opening another door. It was grander than the rest; the wood detailed and beautiful in its antiqueness. I looked at it quickly and moved inside, right behind him. He sat down on an extremely comfortable looking loveseat and motioned for me to sit next to him.

I conjured a chair out of thin air, smiled, and sat in it.

He looked at me as if to say _Nice_.

Aro moved on to the reason I was here…basically to die. "I would like you to join us, Bella." I never thought of this. My life wouldn't be as numb as it was at home; Jasper, Alice, Rosalie, Emmett, Carlisle, and Esme would be fine…well sad at first, but fine. They would never know that I was alive. With Aro, I would be perfectly fine. I could help other vampires here…I could use my power all the time, without worrying that someone will find out.

"I…" He could tell I wanted to.

I stood up off my chair, sent it back to its secret hiding place in my mind and paced around the room.

"I could live with that," I said.

Aro looked at me, a strange and new expression I hadn't seen.

"You are very tempting, Isabella." Oh…it was temptation.

I know…please don't ask me to marry you. For the thousandth time I wished I wasn't tempting to men.

Aro's cool fingers touched my face, softly and slid them down to my neck. I didn't feel like it was pleasuring…it was just uncomfortable, but I let him go on anyway. It's not like I had anything to look back to. He moved on, putting his hands on my waist and pulling me closer to him.

I didn't even like him; he wouldn't make me happy, but I could make him happy. I could be important in some way or another.

I tried to bat my eyelashes, bit my bottom lip—trying to tempt him. I was already tempting enough and this would drive him crazy. I let my breath fan across his face and he pulled me to him quickly.

Then we were kissing. It wasn't the happy kisses I remembered from Jasper and Edward…it was just a kiss. Like it didn't matter. I don't even know what I was thinking, but I kissed him back anyway. This would guarantee a spot of mine in the Volturi.

He didn't pull away. Instead, he pushed me down towards his bed.

Oh no.

This

Was

A

Very

Bad

Idea.

A/N; that was short…and very sad. IT WILL BE HAPPY EVENTUALLY JUST KEEP YOUR PANTIES ON A MINUTE!

Anyway…review and don't be mean, because this is the way I am okay?? And it's not my fault! IT WAS ARO'S I SWEAR!!! Chapter 7 will be up soon.


	7. Chapter 7

Okay its not mine.

Chapter 7: Almost Everything

To my surprise, someone knocked on Aro's door before he could go too far…but as long as I stayed here, I knew that eventually something would have to happen.

After all, I did want to make someone else happy, even if I wasn't myself.

"Come in," Aro said at a normal volume, but remained on top of me.

"Aro, it's time for you to talk to the prisoner." The female speaker didn't seem to notice anything…but it was definitely a human.

Prisoner? I looked at him questionably.

"Later then," he said to me. He got off of me, walked out the door, and closed it behind him. Maybe I could explore a little.

I got off the bed, pulled down my skirt, and pressed my ear against the door. I'm sure he ran towards where ever he was going, so he should have been gone…no sound.

I put my hand on the knob and twisted it, but it stopped at a halfway turn. I tried again…same result. It's locked.

Be unlocked.

I twisted it again…I guess he overlooked that.

I threw the door open and followed his scent.

Straight down the corridor, a left at the red door, a right at the picture of the Eiffel tower, and down another straight corridor. This place was bigger than I thought. Suddenly, his scent was very strong.

"Snooping are we?" Aro said, behind me.

"Curious…" I said seductively. This would make him happy. I had to use my voice correctly, since I couldn't see his face.

"I see…but I'm sorry; I cannot let you meet the prisoner…he's very dangerous you see." He put both of his cold hands on the top of my shoulders and slowly turned me around to face him.

"How did you see me coming?"

"Your scent," he said. "I could smell you as soon as you walked out of our room."

"Oh," I said…stupid aroma. He pulled up one of my hands and sniffed my wrist, just like Edward used to do. I felt like crying instantly.

"Let me go," I said, attempting to rip my hand from his grasp. It didn't dislodge like I hoped it would. "Please," I begged. His face was torn.

What was I doing? There I go again, destroying more people's happiness. I tried to cover my actions.

I leaned into him and kissed him. This time I was kissing him with a passion, even though I wasn't passionate about him. He twisted my arms around his neck and moved his hands to my waist.

Suddenly, something dawned on me…he said '_our_ room.' I just got here, and already it was _our_ room.

I was tempting…

--------------A Few Years Later--------------

"Aro!" I squealed, as he tossed me onto the bed for the third time today.

He sniffed my shoulder, my collarbone. "Delicious," he said. I giggled.

He pointed his lips towards mine and I turned my face away in full pouty-lips mode.

"No pouting!" He said. I knew he thought it was cute when I did.

I turned him over so I was on top and I threw my legs on the sides of his chest, straddling him. He thought I was going to kiss him, but instead I gave him a lecture on how it's evil for him to kill humans, just because he's thirsty.

"Oh come on, Isabella!"—he's been calling me by my formal name ever since I got here—"We have this talk everyday!"

"And we will keep having it every day until you're done with humans," I said.

I don't like that he killed them…"You used to be a human yourself. I mean-how would you feel if a ravenous, freaky, teeth-bared 'I-have-no-clue-what-the-hell-that-is' animal came sucking about your throat!"

He laughed. "I've been doing it for years," he said. "Believe me, there is no such thing as a shortage of humans. Now, if you would stop lecturing me and let me get to work…"

I hopped off of him and lied down on the bed. He got up and smiled at me before closing the door.

I leaned across the bed and pressed down the little secret red button, signaling for Anthony, a human servant, to come.

"Yes?" He said, coming into the room as I willed it unlocked.

"I want money to go shopping."

He returned instantly with a credit card in his hand.

"Come with me to carry my bags," I ordered, throwing on my cutest outfit.

I exited the secret-sewage (that's what I had come to call it) and headed to the mall.

Recently, we moved from Rome to New York. I hated the sewage of Rome, so instead we got an apartment in NYC. I get everything I want. Since I called Rome the secret-sewage I started to call here that too.

Ever since we moved, New York had become one of the rainiest cities in the United States—that was my fault. I shopped almost every day because I had nothing to do, so I had to be able to go outside.

I walked quickly towards the shops down 5th Avenue.

Anthony stumbled with my many shopping bags.

"Is it that hard to carry them?" I laughed, as I was opening the door to the apartment.

I could here Aro talking to the prisoner. I have to admit, I was still stubbornly anxious about meeting him (or her), but Aro didn't want me to. Right now my soul purpose was to please him, and not meeting the prisoner was pleasing him. He also liked that he knew something that I didn't know.

"I'm home," I called out to him.

Then I heard growling…loud growling. I knew it wasn't Aro's so it had to be the prisoners.

"Go bring the bags to the maids upstairs. Tell them to put it all in the front of my closet," I said to Anthony, who was looking very frightened. He ran up the stairs very fast for a human carrying heavy bags…ha.

I heard Aro growling back at the captive and then I heard them fighting…like rocks crashing together. A vampire hostage? I didn't even bother rushing in to help him. I just walked on by, right up the stairs and into my room. I didn't care if Aro died…then it would be time for my life to end…finally.

After about two hours of growling and fighting, Aro came upstairs pissed off.

"Why didn't you help me!" He screamed.

"You don't want me to meet him," I said calmly, flipping through a fashion magazine.

"Not go in and help me, just will it to stop," he said.

My face went blank. I don't use my power much. Like I said years ago, it's dangerous to play with fate. My life was swirling before me…spinning around and around in a circle and there was nothing I could do to stop it. It was routine. I read a book, I went shopping, I made it rain. Life was absolutely nothing to me. Money was nothing.

I barely even remember wanting to be a vampire. I barely remember anything about my human life…only one thing remained.

Edward.

I swallowed hard.

"It's dangerous to play with fate," I said, and got up from the bed and walked downstairs.

Today, I'm going to introduce myself to the prisoner.

A/N: YOU MUST READ THIS. Some people have been bashing me saying that this is so not like Bella. But her life is nothing right now. She doesn't know what to do. She doesn't know how to fix it. As far as she knows, her life will go on for ETERNITY.

Ok next chapter will be up as soon as I finish it…sorry this one took so long.


	8. Chapter 8

THIS CHAPTER IF FOR LovinEveryMinuteOfTwilight!!!!

And to all the people who hate me right now…I will put a bandage on your booboo when this is all over!

Thanks for all your VERY AMAZING REVIEWS! Look at all of them up there!! YAY.

Chapter 8: Escape

What was I doing here? I was standing right in front of the prisoner's door and I had my hand on the handle. I already willed it unlocked…I should leave it that way. I know he's a vampire, so he could have gone out so easily, but he's still here.

I turned the knob on the door and threw it open. I closed my eyes. I didn't want to see how dirty or bloody the inmate was.

"You're free to go," I said, and walked out the front door.

And so am I.

I walked onto the rainy streets and took a deep breath of the city air. I didn't like the city air anymore; I yearned for a small town where everyone knew everyone else's names.

Forks…I saw an amazing slow red truck and a little white house, amidst a very green forest…no brown. I saw a man coming from the house screaming my nickname.

"Bella! Renee is on the phone!"

Renee…my mother.

And Charlie. Dad.

I opened my eyes and smiled. Forks, Washington it is. I turned around to where the apartment stood. I kissed my hand blew away my routine circle.

"Goodbye Aro!" I shouted, and hailed for a taxi. One stopped instantly and I hopped inside.

"LaGuardia Airport, please," I said.

"Sure kid." I didn't like that he called me kid. I was nearly one hundred and ten. What was he? Forty!?

I hacked into his mind…I don't care if playing with fate was dangerous. I have everyday of eternity to mess with it.

'_Left at the stop sign, right at the hot dog stand, straight onto 7th and a left and go straight. Left at the stop sign right at the hot dog stand, straight onto 7th and a left and go straight._'

What a boring guy. His thoughts surrounded around directions. I thought about maybe making his life better, but he was obviously happy the way he was. He smiled hugely the whole ride.

"Thanks," I said, once we were there. I handed him a twenty and a five.

"Later kid."

I growled under my breath. I pulled out a fake passport and the hundreds of credit cards I had. There was another thing. I had to get a new bank account and a new identity. I decided upon Isabella Marie Swan. I returned to my old last name. The family chain had probably worn out by now. I thought seriously about going back to Bella…but it reminded me too much of the past.

I boarded a plane after a long conversation with some dumb stewardess. I flew first class on the flight to Seattle. I figured I would buy a car there and drive to Forks…find a house, buy it, and just… breath and live.

I looked out the window as I rode in silence.

He just doesn't love me anymore, I heard a woman thinking. I could feel the sadness pouring from her insides.

I listened intently to the thoughts of those around me.

_I need to get my car fixed…_

_I hate her I hate her I hate her._

_I'm so ugly. I just want to be pretty!_

_Molly just doesn't understand what it's like to be an adult._

_A little of this here, and some of that…_

_I can't wait until this trip is over._

_I miss my Bella._

My eyes widened as I heard someone think my name. I could feel a few tears running down my cheeks. It couldn't be…

I turned my head towards a seat two rows ahead of me. I got up, pretending to go to the bathroom, and looked directly into the face of the man sitting there…it wasn't him. I could feel my disappointment.

I walked quicker into the bathroom and squished myself in.

"No," I said. I cried into my hands and moved towards the mirror. The reflection was beautiful, but it wasn't me. It was what I pretended to be. I don't know who I am or where I came from. I have no place in the world, and I have no way of leaving it. I'm scared.

"Just let me go," I said to myself. I'll start over in Forks and everything will be fine…

I cried for a few more minutes and decided to go back to my seat before all the passengers grew curious.

"Hi," said the man in the seat as I walked by. I smiled a tiny smile and began to walk faster.

I sat down in the forever-warm first class seat and looked at the food that they had served everyone. I laid my head on the window and held my breath. I didn't want to smell the disgusting airplane food.

Bella, _Bella_, Bella, _Bella_. The name taunted me. I felt as if I had to cry again, but I had to stop myself.

After an eternity, the plane ride was finally over. I got out of there faster than anyone else.

I headed outside immediately and began to walk in the dim dewy light of the evening. I didn't like the way the city was. I it reminded me too much of New York, so I headed into a clothing store. I would need clothes if I lived here.

I tried on several outfits, each of them looking better on me. I bought tons and tons of clothes and shoes.

Shopping was the one thing I still loved, besides reading of course.

"Thank you," I said to the cashier, taking my new credit card from her. I felt a lot of pain as I began to walk away. That girl really hated her life right now, and it was making me hurt…badly. "Be happy," I willed as I walked out. I smiled to myself as the pain instantly left me.

That was the wrong thing to do…but…I can't help it.

I went to a car dealership and paid for a car. I picked out a red orange Porsche 911 Carrera. It looked kind of old, but at the same time, very new. I loved it. It reminded me a lot of something but I couldn't quite place it.

I sighed as I drove my new car filled with shopping bags to Forks. For the first time in a very, very long time, I was excited to do something. I was excited to start over—to begin again.

But for the oddest reason, I found tears were running down my cheeks. I wiped them away with a silk sleeve, as if I could wipe my old life away with silk. The only way I could wipe the past away was with sand paper…but I didn't want to go through with the pain.

After two hours of a cry-drive, I arrived in Forks. I found a hotel and checked in. It was a very nice hotel, especially for Forks. I barely remember this town.

I decided to drive around a little. I got lots of whistles for my car on the way around.

I passed a high school called Forks High. I probably went to school there.

But one house stood out to me. It was the little white house that I saw in my memory. I pulled into the driveway and knocked on the door. It appeared that no one was home. I opened the unlocked door and stepped inside.

I could feel memories flood through me. Charlie, Jacob, Billy, Laurent, James…everybody, everything. There wasn't a moment in time that I wasn't certain who I was. I remember every detail of my life. I remember him.

Edward. I miss you so much.

I closed my eyes and bit my lip, holding back the moisture forcing its way from my throat.

It's time to start over.


End file.
